macklemore absorbing elmo into himself to steal his power
is that a jacket made of bathroom rugs
but shit it was 99 cents
it’s so crazy that there are creatures like this on earth
i know…. children are so disgusting…
flutes players need to breathe
flute players need to breathe
flute players need to breathe
fluTe PLAYeRS NEED TO BREAHTE
the soften part is where the flute players begin to die off one by one
Those that make it to the end of the song go on to reproduce, ensuring the next generation of flute players is stronger. This is known as Survival of the Flutist.
it is time.
soon the era of pumpkin will fall and the northern winds whisper
Snoop Dogg is going to tell us the meaning of Christmas.
Twas the nizzle before Christmizzle, and all through the hizzle…
Not a creature was stirring, not even a mizzle.
All were awaiting Sizzle Clause and his bag
To bring the good homies and bitches their swag
The chizzles were nizzled all snizzle in their bizzles
While visions of sizzle-pizzles danced in their hizzles
And mamma in her ker-chizzle and me in my cizzle
Had just sizzled our brizzles for a long wizzle nizzle
When out on the lizzle their arizzle such a clizzle
I sprizzle from the bizzle to see what was the mizzle
Away to the wizzle I flew like a flizzle
Tore open the shizzle and thizzle up the sizzle
The mizzle on the brizzle of the nizzle-fizzle snizzle
Gave the lizzle of mid-dizzle to objects belizzle
When, what to my wondizzling eyes should apizzle
But a miniature slizzle and eight tizzle reindizzle
With a lizzle old drizzle, so lizzle and quizzle
I knew in a mizzle it must be St Nizzle
More rizzle than eagles his coursers their cizzle
And he whizzled and shizzled and cizzled them by nizzle!
“Now Dasher! Now Dancer! Now, Prizzle and Vizzle!
On Comet! On Cupid! On Dizzle and Blizzle!
To the top of the window! To the top of the wall!
‘Till the sweat drips from my balls, dash away all!”
As dry lizzle that before the hurricizzle flizzle,
When they meet an obstacizzle, mount to the skizzle!
So up to the hizzle-tizzle the cizzle they flizzle
With a slizzle full of tizzle, and St Nicolizzle too!
And then in a twizzle I heard on the rizzle
The prizzle and pizzle of each lizzle hizzle
As I drizzle in my hizzle, and was tizzle arizzle
Down the chizzle St Nicolizzle cizzle with a bizzle!
He was dressed all in fur, from his cizzle to his fizzle,
And his clothes were all tarnizzled with ashizzle and sizzle
A bizzle of tizzles he had flizzle on his bizzle
And he lizzled like a pizzle, just opizzling his pizzle!
His eyes, how they twizzled! His dizzles how mizzle!
His chizzles were like rizzles, his nizzle like a chizzle!
His drizzle little mizzle was drizzle up like a bizzle!
And the bizzle of his chizzle was as whizzle as the snizzle!
The stizzle of his pizzle he hizzled tizzle in his tizzle
And the snizzle it encizzled his hizzle like a wrizzle
He had a brizzle fizzle and a lizzle rizzle bizzle
That shizzled when he lizzled, like a bizzle fizzle of jizzle!
He was chizzle and plizzle, a rizzle jizzle old ezzle
And I lizzled when I sizzled hizzle, in spizzle of mysizzle!
A wizzle of his izzle, and a twizzle of his hizzle
Soon gizzle me to knizzle I hizzle nizzle to drizzle
He spizzled nizzle a wizzle, but wizzled strizzle tizzle hizzle wizzle
And fizzled all the stizzles, thizzle tizzled wizzle a jizzle!
And lizzle his fizzle asizzle his nizzle
And gizzle a nizzle, up the chizzle he rizzle!
He sprizzle to his slizzle, to his tizzle gizzle a whizzle,
And awizzle they all flizzle lizzle thizzle dizzle of a thizzle
But I hizzle hizzle exclizzle, ‘ere he drizzle out of sizzle,
“HIZZLE CHRIZZLE TIZZLE IZZLE, AND TIZZLE IZZLE IZZLE GIZZLE-NIZZLE!”
Hey, what’s Winnie the pooh’s favorite color?
No it’s red because of his shirt
No, it’s yellow because he loves honey
You have no idea what you’re talking about
DID I FUCKING STUTTER?
Things heating up at the Winnie the Pooh fandom
plot twist: santa actually brings you the naked celebrity you asked for and you have to awkwardly unwrap them in front of your entire family